OH HOW THINGS HAVE CHANGED! Well, to an extent. Now I work in the evenings, so I wake up in the morning and wait for the day to begin at 3.30pm. It does seem that I am learning how to do life on a very gradual basis. For example, this end-of-August I have quite a detailed schedule of work I do from waking up time until about 6pm, after which time I can read, watch TV or Skype my friends. (Mostly the latter.) This is so lovely, and so reassuring and just like the days of yore. In a way, I am a little but wary of going back to the routine of getting up and waiting to work.
At this time of the year I start to get anxious that I'm not fulfilling my potential, and that I'm basically wasting my life because of sheer laziness. This year, at least, I can take a step back and say to myself: 'No. I am working towards goals. I am doing as much as I can.' A lot of this feeling of inadequacy comes down to being distracted. I look after people and let them take my time, even when I have a defined schedule. At least I recognise this now, and I can work towards fixing it. Does anyone else have a panic in late August/September? Or do you just think: "I WANT NEW STATIONARY!!!" (I think this too....)
2 comments:
I'm in the same place. I have this mixture of anticipation and apprehension in my head. I want to knuckle down and crack on with stuff, I want everything to be neat and orderly and manageable. I've been making lists. I've started blocking out a new project. I'm so ready for the new year... I think... maybe a couple of new folders would seal the deal.
ILY
I'm having thoughts about being a slacker and never getting anywhere, but mainly I'm just in the mood for Autumny things and looking forward to Christmas.
Post a Comment